Well, today was … a day

Today was a rather terrible day. We knew going into it that it would be challenging, with more climbing than we’ve done in a single day to-date (~6,500 ft of elevation gain).

We started in the rain, which didn’t bode well. But then the skies cleared and we had some truly spectacular scenery paired with some lovely descents.

After that, it was just a long slog. As Kelly would say, a “suck fest”. Lots of climbs. Intermittent rain.

I didn’t realize it but the douchebag convention was in town. I was passed by 15-20 Ferraris and Porsches in a row, each of which revved their engines right as they passed me while giving me absolutely no clearance. Cool. Everyone could see that they were really cool. You all weren’t there but I’m sure you can imagine how cool these guys were.

For the first half of the day I thought I had actually cracked the code to cycling safely in Utah. This was based on two things:

1. I was wearing baggy rain clothes and I had my ponytail tucked in to my rain coat. A driver from behind was unable to tell that I am a woman. This completely eliminated any verbal abuse and mostly eliminated honking.
2. Where the shoulder was minimal, instead of trying to hug the white line I just took the full lane. I made myself an obstacle that they were forced to avoid. If I could JUST get them to swerve across the yellow line a LITTLE BIT, I found that the drivers typically went across entirely and gave me oodles of space. QUITE the realization.

I was so proud of myself! I cracked the code! Apart from the douchebag parade it was smooth sailing for HOURS. But of course, this didn’t last. At one point, during a straight away with no oncoming traffic at all, a car approached me after the shoulder disappeared, where I regretfully could not also disappear, and instead of swerving to avoid me (when, again, there was a long straight away with no oncoming traffic) the car just aimed right for me at full speed and laid on its horn. So I dove off the road to get out of their way. Yet again. The only words I have to describe how I feel about this interaction Mike the Blog Editor would remove. So I’ll leave it to your imagination.

After this incident, I was in a MOOD. I was FURIOUS and I didn’t want to ride my bicycle anymore. I stopped to have lunch with Mike at a lovely area next to a stream. I begged him: let’s stay here tonight. Wouldn’t it be nice to stay here? We wouldn’t have to be out there. With them. We could be here! Where it’s lovely! But Mike is all about doing things “legally” and it wasn’t clear if we could spend the night there, as we were on National Forest lands. So. We kept going.

I had quite a bit of climbing still to do and it started raining and then a really heavy fog set in. Since the drivers around these parts had made it quite clear that killing me would be an acceptable part of their day when the visibility was good, I wasn’t willing to risk riding when visibility was poor. So I walked my bicycle. Uphill. For 4.5 miles.

One thing I’ve noticed in Utah is that drivers don’t often use turn signals. Well, I guess that’s to be expected, they are, on the whole, terrible drivers. Another thing I noticed is that they don’t always use headlights in situations where headlights are warranted (ie darkness, inclement weather). It makes me wonder: is idiocy contagious? If I lived in Utah long enough, would I too stop using turn signals and headlights? Would I start terrorizing cyclists and livestock alike?

Once I reached the summit on foot, I still had 24 miles to go before getting to the hotel. The fog hadn’t lifted. My hip hurt from walking on the embankment next to the road, which was on a sharp angle. My heels hurt from walking in my cycling shoes. I made the executive decision that riding downhill in the fog (where I can be more car-like in my speed) would be safer than riding uphill (where I am slower than you can imagine) and I started riding again. I had a red blinking light on my rear rack, a reflective vest on, and I put a bright white blinking light on the back of my helmet. I was as visible as I could possibly be, and I just started riding. I rode in and out of the fog on the way down to Torrey, where we are spending the night. Normally descents are really fun because I can go super fast, but because I’m riding an ancient bike with rim brakes and everything was wet, I went REALLY SLOWLY. What. A. Bummer. I had a 10% grade decline that I basically wasted.

Eventually I made it to the hotel and it is lovely. While rolling my bike through the hotel to my room, I felt like the human embodiment of look what the cat dragged in. I got a lot of smiles from other hotel guests but it felt like oh my god I am so glad I didn’t endure what she did today.

Tomorrow should be an easy day. And sunny and dry. Praise be.

Highlights

• when we could see it, the scenery was spectacular

Lowlights

• someone tried to run me off the road. Again. I had to throw myself and my bicycle out of the way. Again.
• the people of Utah. It’s so unfortunate that the scenery in Utah is utterly spectacular, and the population of Utah is a steaming pile of garbage.
• the fog
• the rain
• a couple of times today, I really scared some cows. At one point there were three cows eating grass on the side of the road, completely unperturbed by the passing cars. One looked up and spotted me, and did the cow equivalent of jumping out of its skin in shock. It immediately sprinted away from me, which caused its two friends to run off as well. I wanted to say “Wait! I’m a friend of cows! There’s no need to be scared!” Later, during The Fog, I glanced to my side and saw two cows throwing themselves between two bushes and off a rather steep incline, presumably to get away from me. I’d like to think they knew the terrain well enough to navigate that maneuver without issue, but it really didn’t look like a good idea.

Julie’s food

• Breakfast: oatmeal and coffee
• First Snack: Clif bar
• Second snack: Clif bar
• Lunch: hummus and crackers, bread and peanut butter, Gatorade
• Third Snack: a hippy power bar from the hippy market in Escalante
• Dinner: Indian chickpeas and potatoes on rice. A microwave meal in the hotel. And red wine, because the lovely Mike Jones went out to buy wine for me when I was “too cold for beer” after my ride.

Stats

• Total distance: 65.23 miles
• Elevation gain: 6,947 feet
• Weather: intermittent showers and fog, high of 64 degrees Fahrenheit